Honestly, having no distortions at all would be ideal.
In my twenties, whenever I made a mistake at work or was criticized by my boss, I immediately judged myself as "weak."
Why can't I do this?
Why do I always stumble?
I would think about these things, but rarely did I concretely face the question of "what should I do next?" In the end, all I could do was grit my teeth and endure, convinced that "I just wasn't trying hard enough."
Even when I tried hard, things didn't go well. I stumbled in the same places, blamed myself in the same way, and tried again. It was a repetitive loop.
The turning point was learning about "cognitive distortions," a type of thinking habit.
Cognitive distortions are mental habits where you fail to perceive things accurately, leading to biased interpretations. As a result, even in situations that aren't actually that bad, you might feel like you're being singled out for blame or become unnecessarily distressed.
While everyone has some tendency toward this, being bound by prejudice, irrationality, or unrealistic assumptions can lead to significant stress and interpersonal conflicts.
There are roughly 10 major patterns of cognitive distortion. Please take a quick look if you're interested.
① All-or-Nothing Thinking
Viewing things only in extremes: black or white, perfect or failure. Example: "I didn't get 100 points, so it's a complete failure."
② Overgeneralization
Assuming one or two events will last forever. Example: "I failed this time, so I always fail."
③ Mental Filter
Focusing only on negative aspects while ignoring positive ones. Example: Worrying about one mistake in a presentation that was 90% successful.
④ Discounting the Positive
Dismissing good outcomes for various reasons. Example: "They praised me, but it must just be flattery."
⑤ Jumping to Conclusions
Drawing pessimistic conclusions without evidence. Includes "mind reading" (assuming others think badly of you) and "fortune telling" (predicting bad outcomes).
⑥ Magnification and Minimization
Exaggerating your failures and others' successes, while minimizing your own successes and others' failures.
⑦ Emotional Reasoning
Judging reality based on feelings. Example: "I feel anxious, so my life must have no value."
⑧ Should Statements
Imposing strict rules on yourself or others with "shoulds" and "musts." Failure to meet them leads to guilt or anger.
⑨ Labeling
Applying negative labels to yourself or others based on a single event. Example: Making a mistake means "I am a useless person."
⑩ Personalization
Taking responsibility for things outside your control. Example: "The team failed because of me" (even when there were many factors).
When I learned these 10 patterns, I thought:
"Ah, that's exactly what I've been doing."
I particularly resonated with ① All-or-Nothing Thinking and ⑩ Personalization.
I used to assume one mistake meant everything was ruined, and felt solely responsible for team issues.
However, just knowing didn't change anything. Even though I intellectually understood cognitive distortions, by the time I realized it, I was already down. I couldn't catch my thoughts before they swallowed me whole.
So, I started a 10-minute morning page routine.
https://x.com/tsumugi_utatabi/status/2011762151623704610
Every morning upon waking, I spend 10 minutes writing down whatever comes to mind, exactly as it is.
The benefits of morning pages reportedly include organizing thoughts and emotions, mental detoxing (draining the brain), reducing stress, improving self-esteem, and enhancing creativity and focus.
Through practice, I found two specific advantages personally.
First, mornings are when I'm most honest with my feelings. At night, fatigue distorts my thinking; during the day, rationality masks it. But writing in the morning, before speaking to anyone, yields very raw words.
Before putting on a social face or meeting expectations, raw emotions exist there.
Acknowledging this first creates an anchor. No matter how much I adapt to others during the day, the core remains: "But my morning self felt this way." Even if swept away, I don't completely lose myself. That became my safety net.
Second, I developed a sense of "interest" toward myself.
As I write, I notice, "Oh, I'm thinking this now," or "This is my usual pattern." It's an observational perspective—not blaming or denying, just watching with curiosity.
Especially this distance of finding myself "interesting" became a huge support for me.
[→ [Continued in note article] Cognitive distortions are not something to "fix," but to "〇〇"](https://note.com/tsumugi_utatabi/n/n9e0ad864045a
