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300 Types of 'Z' Men You Should Never Date

@reichan_dev
日語2026年6月03日
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TL;DR

A satirical compilation of 300 'red flag' behaviors in men, categorized by 'Z' themes like Gen Z stereotypes, Zoom fails, and sloppy habits. It offers a humorous look at modern social and dating faux pas in Japan.

  1. Men who lump all of Gen Z together
  2. Men who act like the representative of Gen Z
  3. Men who try to solve everything with ZARA
  4. Men who can't throw away ZOZOTOWN boxes
  5. Men who only have a loud voice on Zoom
  6. Men whose Zoom background is an information product
  7. Men whose Zoom name isn't their real name
  8. Men who start taking a bath 3 minutes before a Zoom call
  9. Men who escape everything by saying "bad connection" on Zoom
  10. Older men who talk about "Gen Z marketing"
  11. Men who are so sycophantic to Gen Z it's scary
  12. Men who are Gen Z but only know Showa-era songs
  13. Men who aren't Gen Z but get invited to Gen Z events
  14. Men who approach Gen Z girls just by saying "I totally get it~"
  15. Men who think of Gen Z as "targets to conquer"
  16. CEOs who show off Gen Z slang in meetings
  17. Men who use Mincho font for Gen Z-targeted projects
  18. Men whose survey items for Gen Z projects are outdated
  19. Men who judge all of Gen Z based on TikTok
  20. Recruiters who just want to be popular with Gen Z
  21. Men who think being sloppy is a personality trait
  22. Men whose pant hems are always wet
  23. Men whose pants have too many wallet marks
  24. Men whose pockets only produce receipts
  25. Philosophers who don't wash their pants
  26. Men who trust their belt holes too much
  27. Men who insist sloppy meals are "cooking"
  28. Men who are sloppy but talk about their "routines"
  29. Men who are sloppy but meticulous only about saunas
  30. Men who are sloppy but strict about other people's lateness
  31. Men who are always sleeping
  32. Men who are always awake
  33. Men who always leave LINE messages on unread but watch your Stories
  34. Men who are always saying "I'm on my way"
  35. Men who are always talking about their past glories
  36. Men who always wear the same hoodie
  37. Men whose phone is always at 3% charge
  38. Men who always bring the conversation back to themselves
  39. Men who are always saying "on the contrary"
  40. Men who always speak informally to shop staff
  41. Sly men
  42. Men who are cunning but lack follow-through
  43. Men whose reason for skipping work is always their grandmother's health
  44. Men who brag about "sly" money-saving tips
  45. Married men who approach with a "sly" sense of distance
  46. Men who have a "sly" face but no substance
  47. Men who are unfairly kind only to dogs
  48. Men who unfairly go to the bathroom when the bill comes
  49. Men who are unfairly good only at taking photos
  50. Men who unfairly never apologize
  51. Impudent men
  52. Impudent juniors
  53. Impudent seniors
  54. Impudent freelancers
  55. Men who are impudent but act sensitive
  56. Men who try to pet dogs from an impudent distance
  57. Men who are impudent but stingy about splitting the bill
  58. Impudent DM artists
  59. Impudent subscription-sharing men
  60. Men who are impudent but say "I'm actually shy"
  61. Zero-distance older men
  62. Believers in the zero-calorie theory
  63. Men who try to ask for everything for zero yen
  64. Men with zero intention to learn from scratch
  65. Men who just keep shouting "Zero to One"
  66. Zero-to-One scam consultants
  67. Men who bought "Zero Second Thinking" but haven't read it
  68. Men who attend meetings but give zero answers
  69. Men who speak up despite having zero responsibility
  70. Men who celebrate birthdays with zero emotion
  71. Men with zero distance and strong perfume
  72. Men with zero distance and bad breath
  73. Men who ask for life advice at zero distance
  74. Men who talk about their dreams at zero distance
  75. Men who solicit investments at zero distance
  76. Men who ask for your MBTI at zero distance
  77. Men who are at zero distance but won't make eye contact
  78. Men who ask "Am I weird?" at zero distance
  79. Men who check their selfies at zero distance
  80. Men who peek at your phone at zero distance
  81. Total-affirmation bot men
  82. Total-negation bot men
  83. Men who think everything should be AI
  84. Men who use AI for everything but think it's their own skill
  85. Men who ask ChatGPT everything
  86. Men who dismiss everything with "it depends on the prompt"
  87. Men who put everything in Notion and never look at it
  88. Men who solve everything with spreadsheets
  89. Men who always ask "Is there evidence for that?"
  90. Men who start everything with "If I play devil's advocate..."
  91. Men in all-black outfits with shallow thoughts
  92. Men wearing all designer brands but with a Velcro wallet
  93. Men in all Uniqlo who look down on Uniqlo
  94. Men who constantly appeal about their full-body muscle pain
  95. Men covered in sauna gear
  96. Men who suddenly start talking about full-body hair removal
  97. Men who smell like yakiniku all over
  98. Men whose whole body radiates nothing but ambition
  99. Men whose whole body radiates lack of sleep
  100. Men whose whole body says "I used to be in a band"
  101. Men who cancel the day before
  102. Men who don't show up unless you remind them the day before
  103. Men who don't confirm plans until the day before
  104. Men who are abnormally obsessed only with their bangs
  105. Men who hide their life behind their bangs
  106. Men who live only on stories from their previous job
  107. Men who still use business cards from their previous job
  108. Men who include Yusaku Maezawa in their life plan
  109. Men who absolutely never pay in advance
  110. Men who are too positive to see reality
  111. Men who absolutely never apologize
  112. Men who absolutely never treat others
  113. Men who absolutely always pull out a bill-splitting app
  114. Men who absolutely never carry an umbrella
  115. Men who absolutely always miss the last train
  116. Men who absolutely say "just one drink" and never leave
  117. Men who absolutely never make reservations themselves
  118. Men who absolutely never carry luggage
  119. Men who absolutely cannot call a waiter
  120. Men who absolutely never admit to oversleeping
  121. Exquisitely uncool men
  122. Men who are exquisitely long-winded
  123. Men whose photos are exquisitely old
  124. Men who exquisitely lack cleanliness
  125. Men who exquisitely get names wrong
  126. Men who exquisitely steal other people's stories
  127. Men who exquisitely praise their ex-girlfriends
  128. Men who exquisitely brag while pretending not to
  129. Men who exquisitely dodge the bill at drinking parties
  130. Men who exquisitely project "it's not my fault"
  131. Men who are hopelessly slow at typing
  132. Men who hopelessly never use line breaks
  133. Men whose emoji usage is hopelessly outdated
  134. Men who are hopelessly bad at taking photos
  135. Men who are hopelessly hated by dogs
  136. Men who have hopelessly messy drinking habits
  137. Salesmen with hopelessly quiet voices
  138. Executives with hopelessly loud voices
  139. Men whose restaurant choice is hopelessly limited to chains
  140. Men who hopelessly use "just a nice guy" as a weapon
  141. Men whose premises are too long
  142. Men who don't share the premise
  143. Men who are wrong from the very premise
  144. Men who doubt the premise so much they never decide anything
  145. Men who send prerequisites in Excel
  146. Men who talk for 3 hours just about the premise
  147. Men whose premise is "I'm not the one at fault"
  148. Men whose premise is they just want a girlfriend
  149. Men whose premise is they want to pretend they were popular
  150. Men whose premise is they have no money
  151. Sloppy men
  152. Men with sloppy kindness
  153. Men with sloppy reactions
  154. Men with sloppy "you're cute" compliments
  155. Men who make sloppy restaurant reservations
  156. Men who write sloppy apology letters
  157. Men with sloppy perfume application
  158. Men with sloppy clothes but expensive shoes
  159. Men who broadcast sloppy life noises during calls
  160. Men who excuse sloppy cooking as "manly food"
  161. Men with weakling (zako) mentalities
  162. Men who are weaklings but still provoke others
  163. Men who think sleeping on the floor is "youthful"
  164. Men who are minor characters but act like the final boss
  165. Men who act tough by hunting weaklings
  166. Men who are weaklings but try to coach others
  167. Men who are weaklings but sell "strategy guides"
  168. Men who are weaklings but good at positioning themselves
  169. Men who are weaklings but try to create a "scene"
  170. Men who are weaklings but act strong only in DMs
  171. Men who suddenly do exaggerated Hollywood Zakoshi-shisyo impressions
  172. Men who talk about life after watching "The Nonfiction"
  173. Men who self-proclaim their food as "The Manly Meal"
  174. Men with a "The Salesman" type of smile
  175. Men with a "The Minato-ku" type of business card
  176. Men with a "The Regional Revitalization" type of hairstyle
  177. Men with a "The Venture Capital" type of backpack
  178. Men with a "The Self-Help" type of breakfast
  179. Men with a "The Group Date" type of perfume
  180. Men who are energetic only at "The Drinking Party"
  181. Men who treat keeping crayfish as a heroic tale
  182. Men who act superior about crayfish fishing
  183. Men who only lick the coarse sugar (zarame)
  184. Men who suddenly serve sauerkraut
  185. Men who think pomegranates are only for women
  186. Men who chop things too coarsely
  187. Men who say "This is different from a Zaku!"
  188. Men with business plans that are too vague (zakkuri)
  189. Men who go into the red because of vague estimates
  190. Men who walk around the city with a rucksack (zack)
  191. Men who happily talk about the generation gap
  192. Men who think jealousy is love
  193. Men who use too much gel on their bangs
  194. Men who act like a gentleman but are scary to staff
  195. Generic Minato-ku boys
  196. Generic entrepreneurs
  197. Generic DJs
  198. Generic influencers
  199. Generic muscle-training accounts
  200. Generic men obsessed with being "international"
  201. Men who call themselves a "landmine"
  202. Men who go out of their way to step on landmines
  203. Men who pretend to understand "landmine-style" girls
  204. Men who spend recklessly in the name of "self-investment"
  205. Men with long self-introductions
  206. Men with high self-esteem and nothing else
  207. Men who exploit self-esteem from others
  208. Men who only do self-analysis and never take action
  209. Men who pile up self-help books
  210. Men with eyes like they just came back from a self-help seminar
  211. Men who are loose with time
  212. Men who only steal your time
  213. Men who always appeal that they have "no time"
  214. Men who have no time but make long phone calls
  215. Men who have no time but only show up for drinking parties
  216. Men who have no time but update X (Twitter)
  217. Men who have no time but post Stories
  218. Men who have no time but take MBTI tests
  219. Men who have no time but change their profile picture
  220. Men who have no time but give long relationship advice
  221. Men who think they would survive in a zombie movie
  222. Men who wouldn't reply to LINE even if they became a zombie
  223. Men who talk about cleanliness despite being a zombie
  224. Men doing morning activities with a zombie-like face
  225. Men with a zombie-like face saying "Today is the best"
  226. Managers of zombie companies
  227. Men who prolong the life of zombie projects
  228. Men who can't delete zombie apps
  229. Men who keep zombie tasks in Notion
  230. Men with a zombie-like number of unread messages
  231. Men who suddenly act like politicians when taxes increase
  232. Men who overeat using "bulking season" as an excuse
  233. Men whose "bulking season" has lasted for 5 years
  234. Men who can't fully hide their hair plugs
  235. Men who act superior just because their follower count increased
  236. Men whose tasks increased, not their sales
  237. CEOs who only think about increasing things
  238. Men who can't manage the subscriptions they increased
  239. Men who treat their increased debt as a heroic tale
  240. Men who forget all the promises they increased
  241. Men who create too many coined words
  242. Consultants who escape into coined words
  243. Men who want to trademark their coined words
  244. Men with coined words but no substance
  245. Men who try to make their coined words popular in meetings
  246. Men who mix emojis into their coined words
  247. Men who put coined words in their profile
  248. Men who pad their titles with coined words
  249. Men who make their coined words sound English
  250. Men who love explaining coined words to women
  251. Men who still suggest Zoom drinking parties
  252. Men who laugh while muted in Zoom drinking parties
  253. Men who take screenshots in Zoom drinking parties
  254. Men who are bad at ending Zoom drinking parties
  255. Men whose Zoom background is Bali
  256. Men who pad their bookshelves for their Zoom background
  257. Men whose Zoom camera angle shows only their nostrils
  258. Men who do a mic test three times on Zoom
  259. Men who only say "Can you hear me?" on Zoom
  260. Men whose only impressive thing on Zoom is the exit sound
  261. Men who drink ZONE like water
  262. Men who drink ZONE and do nothing
  263. Men who mix ZONE and Monster Energy
  264. Men who brag about working until morning with ZONE
  265. Men who line up ZONE cans on their desk
  266. Men who drink ZONE and fall asleep
  267. Men who drink ZONE and call it "awakening"
  268. Men whose eyes are bloodshot even before drinking ZONE
  269. Men who only ruin their stomach with ZONE
  270. Men who give ZONE as a present
  271. Men who still haven't moved on from Zenly ending
  272. Men who turn on Zen mode and don't reply
  273. Men who talk about Zen but have a dirty room
  274. Men who conveniently bring Zen into romance
  275. Men who escape apologies with Zen riddles
  276. Men who only take photos when they go to a Zen temple
  277. Men who ignore messages with a "Zen mind"
  278. Men who like cafes that are just "Zen-ish"
  279. Minato-ku boys who talk about Zen
  280. Men who should pay rent before talking about Zen
  281. Men who can't unzip ZIP files
  282. Men who act superior by sending ZIP passwords in a separate email
  283. Men who send photos in a ZIP that don't need to be in a ZIP
  284. Men who open a ZIP only to find it's all screenshots
  285. Men who have a ZIP inside a ZIP
  286. Men whose ZIP name is "Final_Latest_RealFinal"
  287. Men who use a Ziploc as a wallet
  288. Men who are intoxicated with themselves lighting a Zippo
  289. Men who talk abnormally much about ZIPAIR
  290. Men who think they know the morning news just from watching "ZIP!"
  291. Men who see things only on the Z-axis
  292. Men whose only pride is that they used to do Z-Kai
  293. Men who call themselves Z-Warriors
  294. Men who try to use Z-Moves in real life
  295. Men who misunderstand the meaning of Z-rated
  296. Men who give presents in a ZARA bag
  297. Men who still believe in the ZOZOSUIT
  298. Men who are seriously in love with Gen Z-targeted AI avatars
  299. Men who say "I raised him/her" about Gen Z AI avatars
  300. The man who reads all of this and says, "So, what's so funny about it?"
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